New Mom Confessions: What To Expect And Are These Thoughts Normal?!
New Mom Confessions: What To Expect And Am I Normal?!
How do you deal with being a new mom? Your life has completely changed now that you’re once pregnant self is finally the mom you have always dreamed of being.
But are you finding it super challenging? Is it not what you expected? Let’s talk about what it is really like to be a new mom, and how to not completely lose your marbles.
Mom's Mental Health
A month ago I wrote a series of articles about postpartum depression. It shocked me how common this was, and how many women were silently suffering. Now, you may just be a “new mom” and not actually suffering from PPD, but that article series is full of information to help you transition from a shut in with a newborn to feeling like your happy self again. Take a read through that article series...it will open in a new window so you can come back to this article after.
What Did You Expect?
When you imagined being a mom, did you see yourself snuggling your perfect baby all day, relishing in their smell and giggles and feeling like a rock star of a parent? I bet you said “I would never do (insert bad parenting example here)” or “how could staying at home with your children be hard?”
Now that you are a mom, each day brings new challenges. You look like you haven’t showered in a week, you forgot to eat today and you think that if your baby doesn’t give you at least 3 hours of sleep tonight you will probably die.
The Reality Check...
Firstly, you are not alone. Welcome to being a mom! I am assuming no one told you that this was going to be so hard? Your friends all congratulated you on your pregnancy and it was all about cute baby outfits and the best nursery decor... but this is the real thing now. There are no lunch breaks, no bathroom breaks and you have been promoted to CEO of another human life. The responsibility is pretty intense.
If you are a new mom with little support in terms of mom friends or close family, you are probably also pretty overwhelmed and lonely. A newborn baby’s day is pretty basic, and the monotony of it all can leave you feeling like you aren’t doing it right, or that you are not feeling as fulfilled as you thought you would.
The New Mom Learning Curve
The way I would describe motherhood, is that it is a complete learning process. You are new at this, your husband is new at this, and your baby is definitely new at this. You are all in this together though, and I promise you it will get easier.
But when? When will the baby just sleep? When will I stop feeling exhausted and guilty and overwhelmed? I used to ask my sister that all of the time. She would always say “it will get easier”. WHEN?! I would say back.
You Are A Normal New Mom
Here is a little chart I made of the thought struggles you may or may not experience as a new mom, along with what you should focus on instead. The point to this is to show you that these struggles and thoughts are normal, you are not alone, and to focus on the best things about being a mom: